Sunday, 1 March 2015

mainan

there's this guy i sort of like.
then i found out that one of my friends also likes him.
so i let go.

funny, once upon a time i go after the guys i like.
nowadays, i prefer to be chased after.
though frankly speaking, nobody chases me.

i'm tired of thinking of love as a game.
there's almost this innate need
to please the people you like.
i just want to be comfortable with someone.
still, before you get to that point,
you still have to go through the awkward phase
and get-to-know phase
even though i'm tired of these phases.
in relationships, it does not do to skip too many steps.

i skipped steps before,
and of course it didn't turn out well.

at this point i'm just tired.
i try sometimes but i never give 100 percent anymore.
i guess my heart is still weary of love.
just one wrong turn could make it bleed again,
and none of us would be the wiser.

if i may say so myself,
i'm single right now not because i like it that much,
and not because i want to.
but because i know that i'm not ready for a relationship.

i'm just so damn tired,
being single is a relief.

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